Oolite Darwin Awards

General discussion for players of Oolite.

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mossfoot
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Re: Oolite Darwin Awards

Post by mossfoot » Thu Jul 24, 2014 6:48 pm

ffutures wrote:Okay, I have to admit I thought of trying this the second I ran into jellyfish, can't believe it actually worked:

Today I ran into a big pirate pack shortly after spotting a jellyfish, and with very little fuel left. So I fled in the direction of the jellyfish as fast as I could without using the injectors, maneuvered to so that the pirates following me were going to go close as possible to the jellyfish, then flambeed it and hit the injectors as they were at their closest, had just enough fuel to get clear. I think two out of a dozen or so escaped.

No loot, but VERY satisfying...
I'd been considering that tactic to use at some point. :)
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Re: Oolite Darwin Awards

Post by Ranthe » Sat Aug 23, 2014 3:45 am

Not one of mine, but a rather hilarious video featuring the engagement of torus drive followed by "It looks like that's an asteroid field I'm going to fly through...

:lol: :lol: :lol:
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Re: Oolite Darwin Awards

Post by Cmdr Nellers » Sun Oct 12, 2014 8:20 pm

3 pirates tried to jump me as I came out of witchspace in some forgotten Anarchy. I took two of them down with the rear laser as I strung them out then turned and mullered the third head-to-head. Punching the air with the adrenaline rush post combat when I suddenly realised a fraction too late that those 4 cargo pods were blue, and spiralling in on me.

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Great, kid. Don't get cocky. - Han Solo

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Diziet Sma
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Re: Oolite Darwin Awards

Post by Diziet Sma » Mon Oct 13, 2014 12:15 am

Hehehe..

4 missiles at once? :shock: You don't have Nexus Missiles installed, by any chance? :mrgreen:
Most games have some sort of paddling-pool-and-water-wings beginning to ease you in: Oolite takes the rather more Darwinian approach of heaving you straight into the ocean, often with a brick or two in your pockets for luck. ~ Disembodied

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Re: Oolite Darwin Awards

Post by Ranthe » Fri Nov 21, 2014 9:39 am

Today my alternate Commander, "Slippy" Jim Inskipp, learned an important lesson: Serpent-class cruisers are.... shall we say, "not physically compatible" with Astro Mine docking facilities, no matter how well-aligned the approach. :oops:

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Commander Ranthe: Flying the Anaconda-class transport Atomic Annie through Galaxy 2.
Combat Ranking: Dangerous
"Big ships take more booty on your interstellar flights..."

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Re: Oolite Darwin Awards

Post by Diziet Sma » Fri Nov 21, 2014 11:01 am

From the Serpent Class Cruiser specs:
Size (metres WxHxL) 76.5m x 63m x 180m
Without being able to (easily) get precise data on an Astromine docking port, my guess is you're trying to fit a 63m high ship into a 64m high port. That would certainly require a delicate touch on the controls.. :mrgreen:
Most games have some sort of paddling-pool-and-water-wings beginning to ease you in: Oolite takes the rather more Darwinian approach of heaving you straight into the ocean, often with a brick or two in your pockets for luck. ~ Disembodied

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Re: Oolite Darwin Awards

Post by Imaginos » Wed Nov 26, 2014 1:57 pm

Timing is everything... Here's the proof... The other night I locked on to the docking buoy of a spacestation and thinking that I had plenty of time before I got close to it, I wandered off to the kitchen to put the kettle on. On the way back to my PC's desk I heard a massive crashing noise and returned to the familiar "Press Space Commander" message. Who would have thought that a little buoy could do so much damage to a Cobby?

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Re: Oolite Darwin Awards

Post by Smivs » Wed Nov 26, 2014 2:42 pm

Imaginos wrote:Who would have thought that a little buoy could do so much damage to a Cobby?
It's actually much bigger than a Cobby :wink:
Commander Smivs, the friendliest Gourd this side of Riedquat.

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Re: Oolite Darwin Awards

Post by Diziet Sma » Wed Nov 26, 2014 6:49 pm

If it's any consolation, your Cobby most likely also destroyed the buoy.. :lol:

Hence the GRS BuoyRepair OXP, for all those times clumsy NPCs manage to take NavBuoys out..
Most games have some sort of paddling-pool-and-water-wings beginning to ease you in: Oolite takes the rather more Darwinian approach of heaving you straight into the ocean, often with a brick or two in your pockets for luck. ~ Disembodied

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Re: Oolite Darwin Awards

Post by SteveKing » Mon Dec 08, 2014 3:30 am

A Gamut of Emoti(c)ons :mrgreen:

…I’ll buy a towbar. Reckon I’ll make a bit‘v cash carting trash around the system… 8)

…”Yeah, run away, that’ll teach you to pick on yer betters :twisted: ”. Great, I get to try out the towbar. Cobra’s bound to be worth a bit back at the station :) Slide up nice and easy – auto connect, great – off we go at a nice steady pace, should only take a half-hour or so :D Hey! What’s that stuff breaking off my bit of salvage :o – oh damn, I can’t really stop to pick it up; manoeuvring with this great thing behind me is a bit crap :? Maybe I’ll just ease up a bit on the gas pedal and stuff won’t keep breaking off, perhaps I’ll be back before the Honest Jo’s Seconds shuts for the offcycle… :|

…”Oh hi guys, just doing my civic duty and dragging some junk back… What th’…! :shock: Hey guys, hang on a minute, I’ve got nothing but this piece of junk I’m towing!” Sh!t, I’d better get out of here fast, :idea: [engage injectors]. What the f*#&! Injectors offline :shock: ! F*#&! F*#&! Sh!t and F*#&! How do I disengage this thing :x ! Where’s the f*#&in’ manual! “Guys, please, I surrender :cry: ! I haven’t even heard of the Grammatian, Split f*#&in’ Infinitive Curse Eradication f*#&in’ Initiative, whatever it is :( ” Oh why didn’t I read the bl**dy manual :oops: “No, no, please don’t sh…” :!:

Press Space Commander :roll:
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Re: Oolite Darwin Awards

Post by spud42 » Mon Dec 08, 2014 10:00 am

Good one Steve...lol RTFM...
Arthur: OK. Leave this to me. I'm British. I know how to queue.
OR i could go with
Arthur Dent: I always said there was something fundamentally wrong with the universe.
or simply
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Re: Oolite Darwin Awards

Post by Diziet Sma » Mon Dec 08, 2014 12:17 pm

spud42 wrote:Good one Steve...
Seconded!

Thanks, Steve.. I got some good laughs out of that! :mrgreen:
Most games have some sort of paddling-pool-and-water-wings beginning to ease you in: Oolite takes the rather more Darwinian approach of heaving you straight into the ocean, often with a brick or two in your pockets for luck. ~ Disembodied

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Re: Oolite Darwin Awards

Post by Huntress » Thu Jan 08, 2015 7:07 pm

I just delivered an important parcel, and am on my way back to Quandixe. After jumping to a nearby system, I decide to start cruising to the main station to buy some cheap food. About halfway their I notice some pirates approaching me. No sweat, I can easily take them out, I think. They start firing at me, so I line up my sights and let 'er rip... not. What the *beep* is going on!!!! Why aren't my *beep* lasers working!!!! I check to see if my weapons systems are online, look back at the screen, only to be greeted with...

... Press Space Commander

I look down at my keyboard, and realize I've been pressing the wrong button the whole time.
"My goal this weekend is to move... just enough so that people don't think I'm dead." -Anonymous

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Re: Oolite Darwin Awards

Post by Diziet Sma » Fri Jan 09, 2015 12:47 am

Heh.. nice little tale.. and one more reason I love my joystick.. it's kinda hard to pull the wrong trigger.. :lol:
Most games have some sort of paddling-pool-and-water-wings beginning to ease you in: Oolite takes the rather more Darwinian approach of heaving you straight into the ocean, often with a brick or two in your pockets for luck. ~ Disembodied

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Re: Oolite Darwin Awards

Post by Paladin Tux » Fri Jan 09, 2015 1:15 am

So one day I jumped into a system with my shiny just maintaneced cobra Mk III. Flew into a massive pack of pirates. Ike I thing it was 20+...
Now in the system before I turned off my weapons when docking because I had a little 'incident' the time before...
(Back to the pirates)
I thought that this would be the perfect time to use an energy bomb. So I did.
Didn't work.
Tab.
Didn't work.
Woop woop woop.
Uh oh...
Tab.
Tab.
Tab!
TAB!
(Explosion)
"Press Space Commander"

I went back to the save point and looked around my HUD.
'Weapon Systems offline'?
'Weapon Systems OFFLINE'!

*sigh*
Now with 100% less Wonderworm!

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